Don’t Allow Yourself to Use the Word “TIRED”

Recently I was talking to a friend of mine, who has been a state level Taekwondo Champion for the state of California. She was telling me about her strenuous training program which she used to follow when she was training. Among other things, the one thing which she told me was that she was not allowed to use the word “tired” even if the trainer asked her to do 300 push ups. She said “tired” was the word which they could use only after they turned 80.

The Role of Language in Shaping Our World

Language plays a very important role in how we feel and go about our daily lives. The way we use language can determine the results we produce in the near and distant future. Researchers at Stanford University have proved that the way we use language shape how we see the world.

It is often said that what you say is what you get. Saying that you are tired will actually make you feel tired and you will have all the symptoms to prove that. But we don’t realize that it was our word which caused it in the first place.

So when someone asks you “How are you doing?” and you reply with, “I am tired” or “You know how Mondays’ are.“, we are actually contributing towards the impending tiredness or exhaustion by saying these words. The same goes for all the negative thoughts that come into our mind and out of our mouth, like “I don’t have enough money“, “I am not lucky” and so on.

Remove these words from your vocabulory

Remove these words from your vocabulary

Words can Take Power away, or they can Give Power

Whenever we say something, we increase our belief in it. We give power to outside situations, individuals and circumstances which is always disempowering. Athletes, like my friend in the example above, are not allowed to use such language because the trainers are aware of this fact.

On the other hand, when somebody asks you, “How are you doing?” and you reply, “I am doing great!!“, you will actually feel a smile on your face and some adrenaline rushing through your body. It is impossible to say I am doing great without actually feeling good.

If you are stretching your limits while doing a task, instead of saying “I am tired“, next time try saying, “Let me check my physical limits.“, and you will gain the strength to go that extra mile and achieve the impossible.

Do you see a connection between what you have been saying and how your life is turning out?

One of the quickest ways to improve your way of being is to change the words you use, to others and to yourself. When I say words, it includes the spoken words and the unspoken thoughts too.

Just by changing the words we use, we can release a lot of tension and create joy. So the next time you speak, be aware of the words that come out of your mouth. Be aware how others’ negative words make you speak out negative words too, and vice versa. Try to catch yourself when in a negative emotion and speak powerful words instead.

Speak words which profit others, depicts hope, courage and inspiration and which create positive images. Then notice the difference in how your surroundings and people react.

Use more of these words

Use more of these words

Some of the danger words which we should cut from our vocabulary are –

  1. Should / Could – These words, spoken for ourselves or for others, implies judgement and makes people defensive and tense.
  2. Try / Maybe – These words leave ambiguity and leaves an option for you or another to escape commitment in case things get difficult.
  3. Always / Never / Nobody  / Everybody – These words generalise opinions which are rarely the case and can cause people to react unexpectedly.
  4. Bad / Disastrous / Terrible – These words spread panic and can lead to more mistakes, stress and confusion.
  5. Nothing is gonna change / That’s how it is done here – Using such phrases creates a culture of resentment and cynicism which ends up killing all enthusiasm and creativity in people.

Instead, you can use powerful words and make them work for you :-

  1. Declare a Commitment. 
    1. I commit to exercising 3o minutes daily.
    2. Let us commit together to make this company the best place to work for.
  2. Make a Promise
    1. I promise to finish this report in two days.
    2. I promise to never drink and drive again.
  3. Make a Specific Request
    1. Can you finish this report before Friday or not?
    2. If you like it, can you share this article on facebook today?
  4. Offer Support
    1. Is there anything I can do to help you with this task?
    2. I am just a phone call away, if you need me.
  5. Offer Hope
    1. You will make it through it. You are stronger than you think.
    2. Believe in yourself, not the critics. I know you will prove them wrong.

Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny. – Lao Tzu

So the next time, instead of saying –

  • “I can’t exercise more, I am tired.”, say, “I am not tired, let me do one more round.”
  • “I can’t work outside because I have asthma”, say, “I will work to prove I am bigger than my asthma”
  • “I can’t do this because I don’t have enough money”, say, “How can I earn enough money to start doing this?”
  • “I am not feeling good, it is going to be a bad day”, say, “Today is going to be a great day and I am raring to go”
  • “My life sucks”, say, “Today is a new day. Let’s make the most of it!!”

Do this and you will see that your days will get brighter and dreams will turn into reality. Break the pattern of using words which suck power out of you, and instead form a new habit of using words which give power to you and the people around you.

Who are the lucky ones?

As I have talked about my getting back to entrepreneurship with a few of my friends and colleagues over the last month, there is one common reply which I have heard, “You are very lucky. You are doing what you like.” If I take a peek back down the years, I myself remember saying these same words to people at different times. If we look around, we will find this phrase being used frequently by people to express their feelings when they see someone else doing what they would also like to, but can’t due to some reasons.

Hearing this phrase over the last few weeks got me thinking. Am I (or some people) really lucky to be doing what I am doing today? What I realized was that it is totally not the case. Only I know how much scary the decision was to leave a reliable monthly source of income and bet on something which had more chances of failing than succeeding. Only I know how it feels to explain to relatives the merit and logic behind this decision of mine. And only I know the consequences which I might have to bear if things don’t go as planned.

Who are the lucky ones?

Who are the lucky ones?

But at the end of the day, it is a simple choice. A choice of choosing one way or the other. One choice (the safer one) can leave us where we are most of the times, in our comfort zones, and cushioned from all bad things by our EMS – equal monthly salaries. At the same time we will always envy those few (seemingly) brave souls who we see have taken the more adventurous route. But if you take this route, you are betting against odds on your ability to weather the rough storm which lies ahead. Some times you are delighted and excited, yet at other times you are frustrated, disappointed, angry and scared, all within a period of a few hours.

Coming back to the original question – Who are the lucky ones? There are a lot of times in our lives which we can term as turning points, and it is the choices we make during these times decide which way our life turns next. We all have such times and such choices in our lives, irrespective of country, caste, gender or religion. And what we choose to do during such times defines and decides how lucky or unlucky our life turns out to be. There are obviously consequences of whatever choices we make, or not make, as not choosing something is also a choice.

The phrase ‘You are very lucky‘ is just one of many phrases we use in our daily lives to make certain things easily believable, or as an escape from a seemingly tough path. By saying ‘You are lucky‘, we are implying that we are not. And this happens, like in other such cases, very unconsciously without we even being really aware of it. By implying that we are not lucky, we have no reason to even ponder any alternate choice for us. This is another instance of how our language and the words we use shape our reality.

Chad Helsttter has said on choices: “The end result of your life here on earth will always be the sum total of the choices you made while you were here.” And how true this statement is. The lucky ones are simply those who exercise the different choices that life presents to them. We all have been that person at some point of time, yet we are not most of the time. So the only real way to be lucky is to take our choices when they come, and be ready to face the consequences which might come as a result of choosing a certain path.

Thank God It Is Monday

Most of the time we wait for Fridays, so much so that the phrase, “Thank God It’s Friday” is a popular slang used by people to welcome the weekend. But if we think deeply, it means we live our lives for just two days of the week and wait for this weekend from Monday to Friday… I would say a very negative way to live life where we believe that only two days out of seven are meant to enjoy life.

Monday doesnt have to be boring

Don't let anybody else's definition of a Monday ruin a wonderful day today, create your own definition today

This phrase has become as much common as has “monday morning blues” which means monday is going to be another tough, boring day at work while the weekend is still away. It is often said that no one likes Mondays and it is very difficult to get out of bed on a Monday morning. And how do you think your Mondays will turn out when you wake up with such an attitude. Most often you will be late to office resisting that meeting or your boss, and everything starts to happen which you dreaded while waking up. Did you expect anything else to happen with such a defeatist attitude towards Mondays?

In different areas of our lives too, we have demarcated good and not-so-good periods which subconsciously affect our actions, even if we dont want them to… That is the power of language and the words we use in our lives. We say a lot of things without knowing and realizing that our words have tremendous power to shape reality. When we use phrases like Thank God It is Friday and Monday Morning Blues, we are unknowingly cursing our days.

Similarly, our words whether in spoken, written or in the form of thoughts have the power to transform the way we live, in a positive direction too. Using our words, we can instil hope, excitement, love and laughter in our days instead of fear, anger and hatred. So it is very important that we use the words we speak with care. Words can lift us up as well as drag us down. But the good news is that it is our choice how we want to use our words – to start new friendships or to start wars?

So as another week starts today, and another Monday awaits you. Go to work full of enthusiasm. Smile and greet everyone you meet today and give the gift of Monday to them too. Believe that you are going to do great work this week, and even the most difficult of tasks will seem easy.